On Tuesday, December 16, 2014 Mom died at home. Her ordeal with Alzheimer's was done. Watching her die was really hard but I have no regrets being there with her. My Dad and I have encouraged her go to her Mother, sister, brother and other people who have gone before her. We also told her we love her and will miss her. We have held hands and kiss her forehead and kept doing it until she passed away.
She has been cremated. We had her container in my Dad's bedroom but we have company here so I was afraid the kids might do something to it or the dresser that it was sitting on. I don't know if the kids know that container has their grandmother. The container is currently in my bedroom where it is safe. It's surrounded by some Southwestern items I've bought years ago. I got Mom's photo leaning against the container. I have another same photo sitting in the Christmas Tree. Once Dad dies he'll be in that same type of container as Mom's and together they will go up to Michigan to be scattered in one of the rivers where the salmon swim. Mom and Dad had fished many years up in Canada so it seems appropriate to have the container to go in the river. It will dissolve. The container is made for that.
My brother and family are here for Christmas. Please don't take the wrong way when I say I'll be glad when they leave. The kids aren't quite disciplined or smart or conscientious being in other people's houses. They leave a mess. Parents are messy too. -_-;;;
As of right now I still trouble sleeping because I keep seeing Mom dying. It happened at night at 10. I know the image will soften in time but not forgotten.
Dad and I are okay. It just takes awhile to get ourselves pulled together and get the rest we sorely needed. We don't have to worry about bringing medications, changing her, I getting up early to set the stuff ready for the CNA to give Mom a bath and other things she couldn't do on her own.
I don't know when I start posting stuff on DA I think it'll a while. I got things to take of, like my back and deciding what to do with my job that I'm current on leave of absence. I want to find a better one that doesn't inquire sitting down at the computer all day long. My body cannot handle that. At home is different because I'm not all tensed up.
Mom, I really miss you but you'll never be forgotten. I'm trying really hard to remember what you look like even with the help of photographs before the disease robbed you. I know in time it will come back to me. All I care, Mom, is you're free from this horrible disease. I will always love you. I'll keep talking to you to the air if it makes me feel better. You just keep watching us from wherever you are. Rest in Peace, Mom.